Stress in a marriage can create unnecessary conflict. Minor issues turn into major arguments because both parties are simply too stressed to sort through their emotions. If you can reduce the stress in your marriage, you can improve the quality of life for the whole household. Here are some tips to help you do just that.
1 – Openly Discuss Family Finances
Financial stress is one of the biggest obstacles in a marriage. Whether you’re in debt or trying to pay monthly bills, you need to be honest with your spouse about the family finances. You can still split certain aspects of your money if you want to have separate saving and spending accounts. When it comes to planning bill payments though, you need to talk about that as a team. Figure out how to keep your bills low and manageable, and then create a plan to pay them on time every month. You will feel better when you know your bills are cared for.
2 – Create a Balance of Responsibilities
It doesn’t matter if one person works or if both of you work – there has to be a balance of household responsibilities. One person may handle 80% of the chores while the other person handles 20%. You may split the chores 50/50. It’s all a matter of knowing what you each can handle and helping one another along the way. Establish a fair balance of responsibilities so no one feels like he or she is carrying an extra load.
3 – Enjoy Personal Time Together and Apart
Your stress relief may come from a combination of personal time and quality time with your spouse. You have to find what works for you. You might enjoy long walks in the park. If so, have your spouse watch the kids while you take an hour for yourself. Return the favor by watching the children while he goes to watch a sports game with his friends. Then you can also schedule times together where you see a movie, go out to dinner, or do activities you love as a couple. Explore all forms of stress relief, and your marriage will improve as a result.
4 – Make Your Relationship a Priority
Many married couples get in the habit of just surviving. They do the bare minimum to keep the household functioning, and they put their relationship on the backburner. It may be hard to find time for your marriage with work, kids, housework and more, but you have to make this a priority. Your house can stay messy for one more day. Your kids can go to their grandparents’ house for the weekend. Your job can survive without you for an evening. Make a point to spend quality time with your spouse, and your stress will drop dramatically.
5 – Let Go of Grudges
Grudges create distance in your relationship. It’s important to let go of grudges because they do not benefit anyone involved. The grudge holder feels angry at all times, and the recipient of the grudge feels picked on or mistreated. If you have already discussed a matter in detail, let it go. If you haven’t brought closure to it, make time to discuss that. You may also consider discussing the issue with a marriage counselor because he or she can provide professional advice on how to get over that obstacle.
For further assistance improving the dynamics in your relationship, consider marriage counseling. At Sherman Counseling in Wisconsin, we have couples counseling programs ranging from premarital counseling to divorce prevention. We will put you in touch with the best marriage counselor for your needs as a couple, and we have appointments available as soon as the next day. Give us a call at 920-733-2065 to learn more about marriage counseling in Wisconsin.